Late, but not never

Dear readers,

I am honestly sorry i didn't post for a few days and didn't even wish you a Merry Christmas.
To be honest, i am not a Christmas person at all, so i haven't been busy doing Christmas things.
However, i've had a wonderful first Christmas Day at my parent's, we had a lovely diner and of course my gorgeous nephew Isai was there to cuddle all evening.

So, i know it's horribly late, but: ~MERRY CHRISTMAS~ to you all, dear readers!

Today, i will spend my day alone i guess.
It's not sad, i think it's a good thing.

I have some things to think about and maybe even some things to think about and find peace in. And after all, what's more important than find peace in yourself? If you reach that, you can only think about all the other peaceful things you can do for others.


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Also, i was tagged by the sweet Penpusher, to do the Honesty Scrap Award. That means i have to write about ten honest things about myself...
She also gave me the Honesty Scrap Award, which i am very grateful for!



1. I am a fearful person. As much as i hate that, i am now at the point where i know acceptance is the only thing left to do. I try not to fight against it anymore, because it only makes things worse. However, the battle between me and my fears is not over yet. I won't give up. Never.



2. The phase i am going through at the moment is one of partying. Partying a little too much. Although i know it would be better for me to party less and stay home more and go to bed early, i just can't get myself to that point.


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3. I've always been a very, very honest person and i still am.
However, lately i sometimes lie and i feel horrible about that.
I know i will go back to the time i never lied. The only question is: when?


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4. Once i felt very powerful, i felt like i could handle the whole world. Unfortunately i highly doubt that at this phase in my life.



5. I really don't know what i want with my life. There are so many things i want to do, but there are also so many things i don't want to do and sometimes it seems like i am doomed to do things i don't like and i am afraid this has something to do with that feeling of power...


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6. The reason i don't like Christmas is because of it's forced sociability. When i am not in the mood for socializing and spending my time around other people, i simply have to because it's Christmas. To me, it just doesn't make any sense. I also think almost all Christmas trees are horribly ugly and Christmas colours like red and dark green are my least favourite colours.

7. I can't stand my own insecurity.



8. I met someone special, who i really like. Of course, this makes me insecure (which is quite normal, i guess) but i always think this makes me a less interesting girl.


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9. I can't stop smoking, because i don't want to. I still love smoking. Not because it looks interesting, but because i just like it. Simple as that.

10. I've been very, very honest this whole list.

Now i have to tag 7 people to this same thing and i want to give the award to.
I am having some difficulties choosing only 7 people, because they have to be bloggers whom i think are very honest in what they write on their blogs.
Since i am blogging for more than a year now, i have 'met' some amazing bloggers whom are all amazing and very honest in my opinion.
So if i haven't chose you, it doesn't mean i am not impressed by your blog and your honesty.



I choose: Angela from Rags and Scrabbles, Hannah-Zoe from Butterflykisses, Alice from Fifikoussout, the beautiful girl from How To Deal With Heartache, Heather from It ain't me babe, Sarah from Stardust Sparkle and Laura from Translating the Bird.

(Pictures without credit, come from Weheartit.com)